I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to have the audacity to continue to
search for a relationship when I will be compromising myself in/as the
responsibilities that I must do, as writing, reading, testing my blood sugar,
recording the readings, working on English homework, when and as I allow the
thoughts of having a girlfriend/relationship
to constantly run in the mind and
participate with the thoughts within the mind
I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to become shit scared of letting go of
the thoughts of what a relationship might be like, who I would be within the
relationship, what would happen within/as a relationship and face myself here
in/as who and what I am living within and as and make sure that I fucking get
myself to life, make sure that I am standing in commitment of myself to life
and committing myself to myself as life in taking care of myself within having
diabetes, in being aware of myself here in/as what I am in fact accepting and
allowing myself to participate in within/as thoughts and within/as my physical
interaction
I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to give a fuck more about finding a
relationship than myself here as life, not realizing or considering the fact
that all I truly have is myself, that being in a relationship I still only have
myself at the end of it all, and at the end of it all in/as death I still only
have myself and in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed
myself to not focus solely on myself in/as what I am accepting and allowing
myself to participate in and in that correcting myself in every moment into/as
that which supports what is best for all life into infinity, doing my part on
this Earth to stop abuse, and making sure that I am clear from all abuse
I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to move into a depressive state and in
this depressive state look for the positivity within having someone who knows
me and I am able to speak to and shed my shit onto, and in this depression
allowing myself to look for a relationship or something that I have defined as
positive instead of dealing with myself as who I am and clearing me of/as who I
am so that I stand stable in who I am in every moment in living in equality and oneness within what is best for all
I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to not care about myself in managing
myself as life through allowing myself to search outside of myself for a
solution to myself not living me in fact, not facing me in fact, not taking
responsibility for myself and dealing with myself in this I forgive myself that
I have accepted and allowed myself to then place the responsibility for myself
onto another person within/as looking for a relationship to calm the depression
that I have been creating, allowing myself to abuse the other and place an
unfair position onto the other, allowing myself to become frustrated and angry
at the other because of my own emotions that I am going through. In this I
commit myself to letting go all attempts and wants to have a relationship in
order to create a positivity within myself and focus on the negativity that I
have been accepting myself to live within/as and sort that out primarily,
sorting out all of the depressive issues that I have been continuously accepting
and allowing myself throughout my life
I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to attempt to ignore depression
continuously through attempting to find a relationship in which I can make
myself be happy for a bit, only allowing myself to time loop in not facing the
depression of/as who I am within my world
I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take responsibility for allowing
myself to become depressed and face myself in the depression, finding the
trigger points to the depression, forgiving myself for allowing the trigger
points to exist and stop allowing myself to live in depression and live here.
I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that what I have been
doing in/as searching for a relationship as positivity is absolutely abusive as
I am placing the responsibility for/as my own self-enjoyment, my own happiness
onto/as another person allowing myself to place blame onto/as the other person
for my own emotions and feelings in this
not realizing that I would become an abusive partner if and as I were to
continue to allow myself to search for a relationship and not take
responsibility for myself in/as my emotions and feelings. In this I realize
that if I continue to accept and allow this I will become an abusive person and
that within accepting and allowing this I am an abusive person, in this I
commit myself to dealing with my own shit before I even consider to notion
of/as a relationship/agreement, making sure that I am in fact stable in every
moment and taking responsibility for/as my own emotions and feelings, bringing
them back to me in all ways always
I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to abuse my past relationships through
not allowing myself to take responsibility for my emotions and feelings
within/as the relationships, purposely causing conflict within the
relationships because of my own emotions and feelings in the search for the
positivity at the end of all the negativity as make up sex in which I have accepted and
allowed myself to become addicted to as shown through my acceptance and
allowance of/as the depressive state I've allowed
I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to want someone to save me from myself,
from my own creation of depression and allowing myself to exist within so that
I can place responsibility for myself onto another person instead of taking the
point back to myself and investigating it for myself in myself as myself,
forgiving myself for allowing the depression to possess me, in this first
facing the depression as myself and take responsibility for creating it. In this I commit myself to facing the
depression and walking myself out of it through stopping the search for
happiness and allow myself to walk through the depression through becoming the solution to depression of/as myself, stopping the avoidance and ignorance of it.
When and as I see
myself looking for a feeling of happiness within an energy balance of and as
searching for a relationship I stop, I breathe, I bring myself back to myself
and look at the emotions/thoughts/feelings that I am going through, walk into
them and walk out of them, moving through them in equality and oneness. In this
I commit myself to stopping the search for and as a relationship and establish
an effective relationship with myself in stopping myself from allowing myself
to become depressed through walking myself out of the depressed relationship
that I have created with myself.
I commit myself to
bringing back all emotions and feelings to myself and walking through them as
me, standing equal and one to/as the emotions/feelings/thoughts and walking
through them within equality and oneness changing them into what is best for
all
I commit myself to
walking myself out of the depression that I have created within myself through
moving myself within the physical reality in continuing to do what I have to do
when the depression `hits` in this I commit myself to not allow the depression
to control and move myself and that I stand as the directive principle of/as
myself in all moments, in this walking myself out of the depression. In this I
realize that this is only the start of what I will be facing within/as the
depression as I have only now started to take on the depression, in this I
commit myself to sticking to breath
I commit myself to
taking my breath back to me, stopping myself from abdicating my self-direction
to thoughts relating to the want/desire for sex and a relationship within
having company so that I can avoid being here with myself and in this to use
the time that I have to be here with myself, developing an agreement with
myself first and foremost so that I stand stable in every moment of/as who I am
thanks for sharing, cool self-support! „When and as I see myself looking for a feeling of happiness within an energy balance of and as searching for a relationship I stop, I breathe, I bring myself back to myself and look at the emotions/thoughts/feelings that I am going through, walk into them and walk out of them, moving through them in equality and oneness. In this I commit myself to stopping the search for and as a relationship and establish an effective relationship with myself in stopping myself from allowing myself to become depressed through walking myself out of the depressed relationship that I have created with myself.“
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